The biggest victim of climate change in Philadelphia: IKEA
Please note: This article is published as an archive copy from Philadelphia City Paper. My City Paper is not affiliated with Philadelphia City Paper. Philadelphia City Paper was an alternative weekly newspaper in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The last edition was published on October 8, 2015.
Ever wonder precisely how deep underwater your rowhome will be after the impending environmental catastrophe and/or rapture?
Camden will finally reap the rewards of having a waterfront comprised mainly of parking lots.
Ever wonder precisely how deep underwater your rowhome will be after the impending environmental catastrophe or (depending on your worldview) rapture?
Well, a cool new app from Climate Change, an independent group of scientists and reporters dedicated to environmental advocacy, can show you exactly what it would like if the sea level rose, from 1 to 10 feet, just about anywhere.
And, while you may have seen frightening depictions of places like New York City getting swallowed by the ocean, according to the Climate Change map, it looks like our fair city could escape (relatively) unscathed.
Unlike lower Manhattan, which dangles tantalizing close to the open seas, practically daring Mother Nature to exact revenge for all that horrible stuff we did (and keep doing), William Penn rationally decided to locate Philadelphia a hundred miles upriver from scary waves and awe-inspiring but fundamentally gross marine life.
Even given a 10-foot sea level rise, only portions of Port Richmond and South Philly would be seriously affected (Sorry, New Jersey). Which brings me back to my headline — it's been nice knowing you, IKEA, Walmart and all the other crappy big box stores down by the docks. Perhaps seeing these temples of commerce washed out to sea will teach the remaining Philadelphians about the environmental consequences of rampant consumerism.
Or not. Anyway, how likely is it that climate change is going to actually be that bad, anyway? What's that? Even Fox News says it's already horrifying? Oh.
