Ask Papa: Give me a break
Please note: This article is published as an archive copy from Philadelphia City Paper. My City Paper is not affiliated with Philadelphia City Paper. Philadelphia City Paper was an alternative weekly newspaper in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. The last edition was published on October 8, 2015.
"If you are in need of assistance, contact Uncle Joe."
Dear Papa: I’m getting married in a few months. My mother-in-law-to-be has been inviting people to the wedding on her own, without talking to my fiancé and me at all. On top of that, it’s my family paying the bill. I don’t want to fight with her, or make things weird, but I also don’t want a bunch of random people at my wedding (and on my parents’ tab). What should I do? —Wedding Drama in Darby
Dear Drama: Weddings are battles. You and your fiancé are the commanders on the field, but parents are the politicians behind the war. It seems your mother-in-law is a dictator. If you break rank, the whole army may collapse. Where will your fiancé’s loyalties fall? Will your fiancé take soldiers and cut you off at the pass or will you join together for a coup? Will you be tried for treason? This is a metaphor. It is the only one I know. —Papa
Dear Papa: After Thanksgiving this year, I feel I need to take a break from my family. Not forever, but for like a year. I would like to set up an “Out of Family” away message the way people set up an “Out of Office” message on their work emails when they go on vacation. You know, something like, “I am Out of Family until January 1, 2016. If you are in need of assistance, contact Uncle Joe.” Thoughts? —In Need of a Break
Dear Need: Tell them you are going on a trip. They can only contact you by telegram. No one sends telegrams now, so they will not try to reach you. You do not need to go on the trip, but it is always good to travel. —Papa
